emperorshipness.

My friend Leon and I were on our way back from a late-night mcdonald's adventure one night when he posed a question that sort of blew my mind.

"Hey... wouldn't it be sick if you were an emperor?"
"... huh?"
"Seriously... you could tell anyone what to do, and they'd have to do it. People die if they disobey the emperor."

Isn't that insane!?

Just think about it. In a democracy, there's a whole bunch of laws and stuff that are set out the there to uphold justice, and keep people in order and all of that, but somehow I feel like laws in North America are always broken. Some people just aren't scared of authorities for some reason.

But take a second and think about emperorshipness (I have just decided that emperorshipness is now a valid english word :D ). With the kind of dictatorship that they had in China back when there was large quantities of emperorshipness, the people wouldn't dare step a toe out of line, because the punishment was death for like... everything. They even grew their hair out until they looked like those aliens from avatar... just because the emperor told them to. A whole bunch of the stuff that they did was pretty much for no better reason other than the emperor telling them to do it. And they had to.

Leon went on that night to tell me what his primary rule would be if he was emperor. No one may be taller than emperor Leon at any point in time. This would mean that anyone taller than him would have to walk in a permanent awkward crouch 24/7. Can you imagine a whole kingdom of people walking around squatting all the time while one man just struts his stuff?

Now I start to think, what if it was me who was emperor? There's a ton of things that i could do, and no one could say no. How about this? No one but the emperor may talk while performing another action at the same time. I would feel so special with this rule hanging over everyone's heads all the time. Just think about how often in life you are doing something while talking. It would mean that if someone is talking, and they need to blink, they would be required to pause mid sentence, blink, and then return to speaking. If someone was in a hurry to get somewhere and someone happens to ask them "Hey, where are you going?" Well then they would have no choice but to skid to a complete stop, catch their breath, stop panting, speak, and then head off hurriedly once more. No one would ever get anything done. Maybe that's not such a good thing...

I'd probably end up just having the rule that I must be complimented in the middle of every sentence spoken.
That would be awesome, people would never be able to stop thinking about me. I'd get my ego stroked endlessly :D

"Hey daughter... do you -Justin is fabulously attractive and comical - want some tea?"

"I'm quite tired i'm going to - If Justin were to be compared with an animal, he would be a dragon, for so great is his power and gracefullness that it only myth and fantasy could even attempt to capture his nature - go take a nap."

"GET THE HELL OUT OF - Never was there ever a more emporable emperor for emperorshipness than emperor Justin the ultimemperor - MY HOUSE YOU UNGRATEFUL CHILD."

... yeah this post was really stupid :D